Wednesday, January 13, 2010

OMG!!! OMG!!! OMG!!!

I have four followers!!!  I want to reach out to them and call them and thank them...I need to send them homemade cookies or flowers or at least a thank you note...in lieu of that...thank you followers!!!  Hey...thanks so much...


Especially since I have yet to find my voice and my focus.  I think that for now my blog is just going to be a blog about sometimes having something to share.  Let's take today.  For instance.   I have not been  feeling sad lately about being a tragic orphan but today I missed my mom.   I used to talk to her every day...she knew all about my students at school...she would ask about Jake and Jack...the zebra finches...and Lucy...and I would want to entertain her with funny stories just to hear her giggle.   How sad is that...how sad am I today...sad...yep...just a little sad.   I am such a happy person...I am still happy even when I am sad...isn't that sort of sad?   I have framed lovely photos of her all around the house...beautiful lovely framed photos of my wonderful mom...who died not even a year ago.   What worries me is that someday I will not feel sad...do you get used to not having a mom?   I cannot even imagine it but there are days now when I don't feel sad...and then I feel guilty about not feeling sad...mix that in with actually being sad...today is like a rainy day in my soul...

2 comments:

  1. Sorry to read about your loss. I lost my mom when I was 21 and that was hard...I missed a lot of grown-up things with her! And I still get sad and misty some times and it has been over 30 years. Still have my Dad though - he will be 86 in a few months!
    I love your finches! I had MANY several years back! Started with only a couple but at one point I had 76- cute little breeders!

    ReplyDelete